Hello fans of The Drinking Hat,

It’s been a while since anything has been posted from Jordan DCS and Sean Mac.  I’m a new face at The Drinking Hat and my name is Tanner – this is also entry One of my blog series I will be doing every week or so.

I guess you’re wondering what my relationship is with DCS and Mac and where they are?  Well, truth is Jordan wasn’t doing so well.  He had another lapse back into drugs and alcohol.  He was found “yelling at the Vietnamese” and reciting “flashbacks of his tour in ‘Nam.”  Jordan wasn’t even born when Vietnam happened; he is 24.  Family and friends held an intervention for him that I was actually there for.  He’s been in rehab since but I know he’s still on the bottle hard.

Sean Mac has been working on and off in run down comedy/stand up clubs.  Last I heard he was living in Toronto with a “Catholic” girlfriend.  This is what his mother told me when I called to ask what he was up to.  I spoke with Sean briefly at Jordan’s intervention.  He seemed drugged out himself, and kind of smelled weird like stale vegetables.  He wasn’t wearing the most proper clothes either.  I don’t mean to judge but sweat pants wasn’t the greatest choice that day.  He told me he was planning on writing for the site as soon as he got time to sit down at a computer but, again, that was a while back.

So, how do I know them?  We all went to high school together.  I emailed Jordan in rehab and asked if I could write for The Drinking Hat.  After I was heavily questioned if I ever “worked for Al-Qaeda” (he was getting his wars mixed up) he finally accepted that I wasn’t a terrorist but probably was up to some “shady shit”.  He said he liked that and gave me the password to the site along with his blessings.

I hope by sparking up this blog series that Sean and Jordan decide it’s time to return to The Drinking Hat.  So onto the blog entry:

I’m a man of simple pleasures.  I enjoy most things life offers like pizza, video games, and stealing children’s Halloween candy.  I have a big night ahead of me this week.  Some might question why an adult would prowl the streets on Halloween night.  I think that question is answered in itself.  The economy is in rough shape and I need my candy fix.  Need it.  And don’t care how I get it.

Today I decided what I was wearing for my spooky stealings.  I figured the maniac clown was a bit played out so I went with a fresh and mischievous look as the nudist in a gorilla mask.  As I see it, the children and parents will be too overwhelmed and mesmerized by my throbbing meat-dong just long enough for me to snatch some candy. Wish me luck.

One thought on “Tanner’s 500 Word Blogs: Blog One Rebirth

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